*This article mostly pertains to women and people who are not cisgender men. I’ve tried to use language to be inclusive of all identities under the masculine of center and androgynous umbrella. If any language is inappropriate, please let me know in the comments!
Let’s talk masculine-of-center and androgynous individuals. I love them! I think they are precious and cute and cool. I admire them. I want them. I want to be them! I have a ton of feelings about them. A lot of them, however, involve feeling excluded because of my size and body shape.
Tumblr and Instagram deliver most if not all of my MoC/androgynous content and the face of that content is thin, able-bodied, and white. Think of Ruby Rose, whose skinny tattooed bod inspired queer and straight women alike to rip off their clothes and dance to the OITNB theme song. I don’t have anything against Ruby Rose or her alluring accent, but she’s a perfect example. These images dominate the androgynous and masculine representation online, to the point where it can leave a fat queer feeling hopeless about ever looking as good as they do in masculine clothes.
There is a lot of nuance when discussing masculinity or androgyny and fat bodies. What might be a cool, fashionable androgynous look for a thin person (loose top and jeans) would appear sloppy on a fat body. Fat people, whether they are presenting as masculine or feminine, have to dress to the height of that identity. Where do those who can’t afford tailored suits or retro pinup dresses fall? Where do fat people fall when refusing to conform to one of these extremes renders our bodies genderless? Is androgyny harder to perform as a fat person because it’s too easy? Because after forgoing makeup or skirts, the default gender is just a blob?
As I said, a lot of nuance. This isn’t even accounting for other factors like race or ability. For now, I’d like to focus on fashion and bring the rest of these questions up in the future. But these questions exist and should be considered. I still don’t know the answers. But in the world of a small-fat white person, here’s a glimpse into non-feminine clothes shopping:
My hips are 52′ wide. Do you know how hard it is to find pants in the men’s section for that size? It’s very hard! Sometimes I can find pants in the women’s section, but they enhance curves I’d rather hide. Pants are a general nightmare. Women’s button up shirts are easy to find but are often too tight in the arms or gap at the bust. Men’s button up shirts fit nicely in the upper body but are too tight at the hips and too long. Shoes are a different game altogether if you have wide or extra wide feet. You’re left with two or three options, most of which are bland black athletic shoes. Wing tip shoes or even popular sneakers like Vans are off the table. Being a big woman is hard already. Being a big woman trying to find menswear feels hopeless.
Thankfully there are online clothing retailers popping up left and right with MoC and androgynous options. My thin partner is interested in Wild Fang, a shop that goes up to a 2x in some tops and XL in pants, but is generally a no-go for me. There’s TomboyX which sells underwear and lounge-wear up to a 4X, that’s a bit better, but still leaves out those 5x and up. I would love to see a specific plus size store for MoC/androgynous people. I’d love to see how far that would go. Would it succeed? I’m not sure. How many people fit that demo? How many of them don’t have the choice to present in a way that makes them feel whole?
I’ll be very honest here: sometimes I wish my body was smaller so that I could fit into this androgynous or masculine ideal. I work really hard to not think this way. Accepting or loving my body was so much easier when I was femme. But still, I try.
Are there any styles that you feel you can’t wear because of your body size or shape? Would you like a roundup of retailers that sell plus size clothes for masculine of center or androgynous style? I’d love to hear!
Thanks for reading and have an absolutely wonderful week!
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